Of Slovakia & Austria 2010

Wow! What a great holiday! Two great countries. Two great capital cities and a wonderful skiing holiday in between. Now back to porridge!

Óf Beans Means ..Poor Youngen

We spent a day yesterday sightseeing and being the sort of tourist I normally can´t bear. We hopped on a tour bus and followed a lady around with an umbrella in the air. We did the main palace then the opera house and finally a good walk back to the hotel caused mainly by jumping on the wrong tram.

My German from university days was coming back to me slowly and Youngen was having a go too with his "zwei heiße Schokolade bitte".

In the evening we went for a Serbian dinner just around the corner from where we are staying. Youngen´s eyes were popping out of his head as each waitress appeared prettier than the next. They do even less for Veggies than the Austrians´the Serbs it seems. Pretty waitress No.1 informed me that all they had to give me from the buffet menu was a plate of beans. This was my bad news but also Youngens for he knew that we were sharing a room later that evening. The waitress added that I could help myself to the salad bar (which, as it turned out, was jealously guarded by a roasted pig´s head).

I chatted to the pretty waitress as Youngen ogged on. Chatting to females is a skill that takes a long while to develop I thought afterwards. In fact, so long that by the time its of any use it´s of no use......

Of Vienna and Veggies

Youngen and I left Kosice, Slovakia yesterday having spent a great evening in the company of "Mo n Katz" two locals and former employees of Legal-Island. They had arrived in NI in 2008 and their first jobs were stuffing our company brochures into envelopes. It was great to catch up on them both again and find out how they are doing and I supppose, put some local context to our first ever foreign employees.

They kindly gave us a bottle of Modevina - a Solvakian alcoholic delicacy which we both strained hard not to drink on the 7 hour train journey to Vienna. We arrived to our Hotel last night and immediately went out looking for something to eat. No-one seemed to be around even though it was only 10p.m. except for the police that is who stopped us and demanded to see our passports. They wanted to know what we were doing out so late (clearly Vienna goes to bed early over the Xmas period at least). When Youngen informed them we were looking for a veggie restaurant they laughed. Getting back in their van they shouted "this is Austria we eat only meat here".

Of Santa and very kind human beings

Wow! What a way to spend Christmas Day skiing among gorgeous scenery as snow flakes trickled to the ground. It didnt end the best however. Youngen knocked over a geezer on the nursery slope and his son skiied after him looking for a row which he promptly got from his uncle. Goodwill on Christmas Day was not in great supply between us all. Hey Ho as Santa Claus himself might say.

Our drinking pals from Warrington didn´t make it out on the slopes yesterday on account of a couple of thunderous hangovers. Apparently they stayed on at the night club for a good two hours after we had left them on Xmas Eve. They left at 4a.m. bladdered. Richard made it back to the Hotel but his mate Lee slipped over and couldn´t get up. He waited on the ground hoping Richard would realise he was unaccounted for but didn´t. Still unable to get up Lee decides to phone his mate but thereś no answer. Eventually Leeś discovered on the ground by the nightclub DJ walking his dog before going to bed. Heś then dragged back to his hotel by this poor samaritan with Lee in his pickled state declaring "Youre a very kind human being" every 10 minutes. The British abroad hey? No wonder people remember us.

Of Table Wizzardry

I went to a night club last night and was reminded how I mispent my youth. I played 20 games of table football and wiped the floor with every oppostion that dared face me across the table. So why isn´t table football in the Olympics? Lifeś just not fair.

Youngen and I went with a couple of guys from Warrington we´ve befriended. Theyŕe true down to earth Northern lads with no airs and graces - just great good old fashioned solid company. We popped into the Liptovsky for a quick one and were the last to leave at 3a.m. Boy they can drink. When I say "we" it was Youngen and I who left. The Warrington lads may well still be there for their pints and shots kept on coming and we left them stuck to the bar. Best go find out later I suppose.

The weather has turned misty and it hasn´t snowed for 3 days but I´m determined to ski on Xmas Day. So watch out world the table football wizz is on the slopes....

Of Mulled Wine and Christmas Crackers

Hah! Unlimited access to the Hotel internet. Not a kid in sight. Granted it is 4.45a.m. so I´ve had to earn my little nugget of Internet time by crawling out my pit at some ungodly hour.

I learnt a very important lesson yesterday. You can´t enjoy mulled wine and then ski better or even really at all. Two cups of the stuff before doing another intermediate run proved to be a very silly idea. I felt like someone out of one of those Jimmy Saville alcohol campaign adverts where they show a bloke who thinks he can operate well after alcohol who then goes and proves otherwise. My ass and the ground must have met countless times from the end of the chair lift to the bottom of the slope. Never again. Not even on Christmas Day.

Speaking of which, it is Christmas Day today. Here in Slovakia they celebrate it on 24th December rather than 25. Who knows maybe Mother Mary went into labour on 24th anything is possible. According to the Hotel signs that pop up every now and again we were meant to reserve our place for the Christmas Dinner. If we didn´t, the sign warned us, we would be assigned one. Being the hell raisers we are we didn´t so who knows who weĺl get for company over Christmas Dinner and indeed, what poor crittas will get Youngen and I. I must find out how you say "Merry Chrismas" in Slovakian and "would you like to pull this cracker with me?".

Of Kids in the snow

Hah! At last! Access to the Internet on the Hotel PC. Said access thus far has been severely restricted by kids, many no more than 4 or 5 playing computer games on the Net all day long. There should be a sign up saying "No kids playing computer games" or better still just "No kids".

I´m aching all over today. Every bone, joint and part of my limbs is aching or sore or both. I must have skiied the run outside the hotel 10 times yesterday. I also spent a good while teaching Youngen how to ski. For a while he just wasn´t getting in and he was running into the side netting, the fences, the young, the old and just about anything that moved or didn´t. We then decided we´d go down the slope together with him slightly behind me. Somehow we got the skis tangled and ourselves in a terrrible human knott but managed to remain upright. It must have looked as funny as it did quite incestuous. But now hes got it and for the last two runs hes remained upright. Granted I do have to ski in front of him and warn others that weŕe around but it´s a start.

And now to breakfast and to do the whole thing all over again.