No.420 Of Painful Pauses

I spoke at our Annual Conference yesterday. I think it went ok but we'll see what the delegates thought when they reply to our survey by email today.

There's a great art to public speaking and I think it's one of those skills that need to be constantly practised and refined. Your style and pitch, not to mention content has to change each time in accordance with your audience, the time of day you're speaking, the venue and a whole load of other factors too.

There's a guru around at the moment that says before you can be considered excellent at anything you have to clock up at least one thousand hours of practice. He wouldn't claim that once you've clocked your hours you'll be excellent only that you'll never get to excellence before notching up over 1,000 hours of "air time". I've no idea how many times I've spoken in public but it must be well into the hundreds by now.

What I'm learning now is that waiting on feedback and scores is almost as nerve racking as walking to the podium. Perhaps it's the equivalent of that moment when on Strictly they say "and the couple leaving the competition tonight is...................[huge pause]."

No.419 Of Replacements for the Ulster Fry

I got talking to Mr Slimming World this morning as I waited to get in the pool. He runs the local slimming club and will tell you exactly what is wrong with everyone's diet and how best to lose weight. In fact its comes out at you like straight off one of his intro cards he no doubt uses when trying to attract new members to his club. As he was saying this two other early birds were looking away guiltily for they, I know, yesterday both availed of the local Spar's offer of 10 pieces of an Ulster Fry for just £2! Rotten for the heart but good for the soul I'm sure they would both say.

We have a busy day today getting ready for Annual Review of Employment Law Numero Uno at the Culloden Hotel. It's almost sold out. I'm speaking at it. Can't wait. It's a huge pleasure speaking at the Reviews. Beats a 10 piece Fry any day.

No.418 Of DIY Confessions

It's day 2 and my TV is still on the wall. I write this proudly for anyone who has gone before and doubted my DIY ability.

I was back in the pool today after a long absence on account of my cold. I did just 20 lengths and then called it a day. There were too many in the pool for my liking. It's bad enough having to go forward but forward and round people every now again at that time of the morning is just too much to ask.

I got talking to one of the Earlybirds afterwards. For some reason he told me that he's 64 and still can't read or write. A strange confession to hear in a pool I know. He told me he used to sweep chimneys and could remember everything discussed with the person the following year each time he went back to them. "Never had to write anything down either" he told me. "Things were much better in those days" he lamented. I bet he left his front door open too.

No.417 Of TV Times

I spent much of last night wrestling with my new TV and fixing it to the wall. An easy enough task you may think but it's a process which requires an almighty bracket to be screwed to the wall and then the TV to be dropped carefully onto said bracket. I called the neighbour in for assistance. She duly arrived with a toolbox and a tube of prestles. An hour later all was up.

Problem is the reception is not great. On BBC1 all I can get is 42inches of fuzz and crackle. Even the good old time tested technique of shoving a coat hanger in the back of the TV for reception didn't appear to work.

Plan B whatever that is. Possibly Satellite TV.

No.416 Of Wee Buns

I was up at the crack of dawn today in Dublin. In fact earlier than that. It was 5.30a.m. to be exact to make sure I made a meeting in Belfast for 9a.m. This I managed but my opposite number didn't. He thought the meeting was for 11a.m.. We're going to try again next week and the cream buns are on him methinks.

I used the extra half an hour to go shopping and skipped up the alleyway featured here. I've always like this part of Belfast it has a certain je nais ce pas.

I'm keen to get home but I've loads of work to do before the weekend.

No.415 Of Feeling Blogged Out

I have a really bad cold today. I feel groggie and not at all bloggie. Out.

No.414 Of Jamie's Crabs

I'm in Leeds at the moment - home of Jeremy Paxman according to the Tourist brochure I found in my room (though how welcoming visitors may find this fact I'm not quite sure).

I'm staying at the Queen's Hotel in the centre of Leeds. It's like the grand old lady of the hotel industry. The lift says call "Car" rather than elevator or indeed lift and the old ballroom (home of our Annual Review conference today) looks like it's the kind of place the local parliamentary hustings take place every four years or so.

I was led astray by another bad woman last night. Jayne and I went to dinner at Jamie's (Mr Oliver, the waiter assured me, had only put in one appearance in the restaurant all year this year). She made me eat a bit of her crab brochette. I accepted partly on grounds of taste but mainly nostalgia for the poor thing had come all the way from Devon to be on the end of my fork last night.

Anyway, crabs or no crabs I'd better get on with the day....